Goodbye, Uterus! 
You stale malcontent.  
How hotly I ache 
For the years we spent 
In preparation 
For our monthly coup. 
Now, dear uterus, 
I bid you adieu! 
For twenty long years 
You’ve ruined my life 
With inconvenience, 
Mass havoc and strife. 
But you’ve been removed! 
Your terror has ceased. 
What triumph I feel 
At besting the beast. 
I’ll no longer deal 
With your fits of rage 
Or lock myself up 
Inside of your cage. 
You dastardly fiend! 
Useless to the core. 
How freeing it is 
To have you no more. 
I’ll never miss you, 
So rife with disease, 
And now I can live 
However I please! 
You no longer have 
Control over me! 
My future is bright! 
I’m finally Free!